Back on Track!

After my last post, school got really busy. It was an entirely new experience for me because my old school required very little of students. It was easy to skate by doing only the bare minimum. However, this year, I'm feeling incredibly challenged. My classes are much more difficult and more is expected of me as a student. So, rather than take in negativity towards school, I've changed my view on the challenges I'm facing. I am, in fact, grateful for the challenges that I am taking on. They are preparing me for the rest of my life and helping me get my priorities in order. Because of the difficult assignments I am facing now, I will be much better prepared for college. In every day life, I will be capable of working harder and being more organized.
I feel that this is another sign that I made the right choice in switching schools this year. I am so grateful that every day I am given signs that I made the right decision. I am so grateful that God helped push me down the right path. I am so grateful that I am being challenged and working hard, it's felt amazing!
Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas!
Love,
Stephanie

Reflecting on the Weekend

The weekend in Illinois, overall, was amazing. I got to see my best friends, my sister, and a beautiful school. After touring the campus, visiting classes, and interacting with students I can see myself calling that school home in just a few years. I was so impressed with the sense of community and the open arms that everyone had towards the visitors. I was so pleased to find a group of students who were perfectly content playing board games and watching movies on a friday night. The school was to put it simply, so close to perfect. 
I'm so grateful to have had such a wonderful weekend in every way. 

Goodnight, world.

Love Always,

Stephanie

A Beautiful Day

Today is an incredibly beautiful autumn day in Elsah, Illinois. The trees' beauty is especially vibrant under the bright sun and blue sky. The gorgeous shades of yellow, orange, and red surround the college campus. At the very edge of the campus, a bluff looks over the Mississippi river and the landscape of Illinois. This is probably the most beautiful place in the midwest. I feel so blessed to be here. I never expected to feel this content and happy so far away from home. It's definitely a step towards getting over my anxiety. In the past, I've dealt with severe homesickness that brought on bouts of anxiety and depression. I have barely felt a hint of those feelings on this trip. 
I am so grateful to feel so at peace here. I'm so grateful to be surrounded by such a beautiful place. I'm grateful for the time that I've gotten to spend with my sister. It's been an amazing few days so far. 

A Reunion

This weekend I signed up to visit my sister's college in Illinois. When planning the trip, I told my best friend from Indiana to come as well. Fortunately, she was able to. Over the past 24 hours I have been reunited with 8 of my best friends, one of my cousins, and my sister. It's been a good 24 hours to say the least.
It all started yesterday when I flew into St. Louis. Two of my friends live in St. Louis, so I told them to meet me at the airport. My friend Alli brought my other friend Rachel, who had no idea I was coming. When they arrived at the airport, there was a lot of screaming, laughing, and tackling. We ended up on the ground laughing and got some pretty weird stares. It didn't matter though, it was so good to see them! After I visited with them for a little bit, I hopped into a car and came to campus. I was first greeted by some people from my youth group that I didn't know were coming. It was such a pleasant surprise to find them here! In that group was my best friend, Katherine, who I only get to see about once a year. Once again, there was some tackling involved. Soon after we got settled in, I was able to see my sister for the first time in four months. She and I are best friends, so I was insanely excited to see her. Later last night I was able to see my cousin that I haven't seen in about 12 years, which was interesting!
Today I spent the day touring campus, sitting in on some interesting classes, and spending a lot of time with my friends and sister. It's been such a harmonious day. 
I'm so grateful to be reunited with so many of my friends, but most of all, my sister. I'm grateful that feelings of depression have simply washed over me on this trip and I've felt happiness. I'm grateful that my anxiety is minimal. I'm grateful for the amount of love around me and that I feel. 

New Friends

After two years of being unhappy at my small high school, this year I transferred to a larger school. I went into the school year knowing about three people. That's a small number when there are 1,200 students in the entire school. It was terrifying to say the least. I did it though. 
The beginning of the school year hasn't been terribly easy. Not being able to find familiar faces in the hallway sends a sinking feeling to the pit of my stomach. I know that making friends is a long, tedious journey, but I wish the process would speed up. I will admit that some days are more difficult than others. I'm getting there and that's what matters. I'm loving meeting all the new people. 
For instance, two girls and I went out to dessert in town tonight. I knew them both from my history class, and really like them. They're down to earth, laid back, and kind. There were never any awkward pauses or feelings of exclusion. The entire evening was harmonious and filled with laughter. I'm so grateful that these girls are so friendly and that I'm getting to know them better. Its so nice to be able to call them my friends. 

Goodnight, world.

Love always,

Stephanie

Serenity

Every once in a while, some thoughts have the power to occupy my mind for days on end. Maybe its something that scares me, something that excites me, or who knows what else. When I have those thoughts, and I want to focus on other things, I think of this prayer. Its such a simple one, but such a beautiful one. It helps me understand that there are some things I need to just understand and leave it at that.
I think that the words of this poem also come into play when people form opinions about you that you don't believe are true. As a high school student, I witness unfair judgements every day. Sometimes, they're about me. This prayer helps me feel at peace with the fact that I can't change what other people think. I can simply choose the way I react to the judgement. And the perfect way to react is to move on. 

I hope you enjoy these inspiring words.

Goodnight, world.

Love always,

Stephanie

Finding the Good in a Sick Day

This morning I woke up feeling under the weather. I decided to stay home from school and get some rest. After falling back to sleep for several hours, I woke up and trudged downstairs to the family room with my comforter. I settled down on the couch and sat there for quite a while simply watching and listening to the heavy rain. Although the rain outside seemed hectic, from my indoor spot it was very calming. Pretty soon one of my sweet cats and my dog wandered over to join me. They both made themselves comfortable on my feet and fell asleep quickly. It was such a heartwarming feeling to have my little angels caring for me. That moment of relaxation, calmness, and love was definitely the highlight of my day. 
I'm grateful for the sense of peace that I felt. I'm also grateful for my animals that express nothing but love. 

Have a wonderful evening!

Love always,

Stephanie